Day 21 (and 22)- Back to the Future and summation

you know what i like about losing a whole day to the international dateline, is that i get to have a lot of self-reflective dialogues over my trip.

lots of things in south america were expected, like the inherent machismo attitude (in Chile, they serve coffee "with legs", have a guess what that means for staff attire), the optimism in face of clear chaos (all planes are "On Time" despite boarding half an hour after departure time, and when everyone applauds the pilot for landing you betcha you're glad your travel insurance pays double for death on a plane). many things were hopefully expected, like the generosity and hospitality. Peruvians and Bolivians in particular are very gracious. there were 3 different young couples who gave me their number in case i needed help (NOT a threesome proposition, they all had kids and were devout catholics!), and one time i couldn't use the public payphone and some old lady pulled out her mobile and dialled it for me without seeking thanks or money.

some things were surprising, like how much i was moved by cusco and machu picchu (i like to think of myself as a stoic, unfazed, super cool person. really. ahem. stop laughing.), in fact if it were allowed i'd like to have my ashes scattered there. that's right, it's so beautiful i want to die and have my human body burnt to a crisp just so i could stay there forever.

i was surprised by how much i liked cigars. i regret not trying them earlier and wish my cigarette prejudice hadn't plagued me. a cigar is like dark chocolate with chilli, it's like eating the heart of a tree. everything else you drink or eat after also tastes very interesting. of course having said that i still find it a costly habit. i don't know why the government puts pictures of lungs and foetuses on cigarette packages, those things don't deter smokers. my mother finds them interesting rather than disgusting. what deters me is the idea that smoking irreparably affects your quality of extreme (read fun) physical activities and experiences. i would not put cigars above skiing or snorkelling or hang gliding, and i think if they put pictures of someone abseiling it would work better at making kids think twice about smoking, certainly smoking less. it's one thing to know they could kill you when hey, eventually your own body will kill itself, and another to know you won't be able to play basketball with your friends without wheezing after 20 minutes.

i was also surprised by how much i enjoyed travelling solo. i had prepared 3 seasons of 30 Rock on the ipod thinking i'd be lonely and watch them all, but ended up not watching any of it. here are my pro's of travelling by myself:

• you always get to shower first
• you get to have the window seat
• AND the tv remote
• you do your own itinerary without compromises and stop or push on without needed to have a huge debaucle/debate
• taking off all your clothes (it's not a biggie for guys, but for us girls it can be a rare luxury)
• meeting new people, especially other solo travellers
• feeling of invincibility

and then there are the cons:

• no one to watch your crap when you need to pee (actually lots of times i asked a couple to "mira equipajes por favor" so it's not an always con)
• wanting to share an experience or gripe. you can do this with a stranger or new friend, "look a monkey!" but you can't do it the next day with a different person because they don't know about that first monkey.
• not being able to try the food your companion ordered, or justifying a really huge order "for two"
• having to be careful at night and not getting drunk for fear or being raped/vomiting in own hair. although this one is sort of a pro because it promotes sobriety and a good liver
• screw sobriety, no travel buddy means you can't put your duty free alcohol allowance together
• irrational fear that your pet or loved one is going to get run over or sick and they'll die before you get back

in conclusion, i would rate parts of south america as places i will definitely return to. it's been the best destination so far. adios!

Day 1- Lima, Peru

I stayed in Miraflores, a suburban place free from child prostitution, street-side cocaine and ´brusquillos´(positive that´s NOT how you spell it) at discotheques, in the words of another savy tour guide (just so my mother knows, the tour did have other humans so no kidney removal was going to be extracted). a brusquillo or however it´s spelt, is a kind of bridge, given to hot latinos who dress up and seduce foreigners for their marriages and visas. how euphemistic is that? sounds so much nicer that mail-order bride, no?

the tour itself was the usual fair, ruins, plazas, changing guards, cathedrals, catatombs (please people bury your dead in the ground) and obnoxious unabashed display of the Catholic church´s wealth from extortion, etc etc. everytime some WASPy American is awed by large, magnificent cathedrals i bite my tongue from saying, really? you LIKE how they make you feel small, irrelevant and guilty helplessness? more than money and greed and sin-free, easy protestantism? but since most people on the tour were full of Catholic pathos and easily outnumbered me i simply appreciated the busts of Jesus and his various poses during death.

there was a beach nearby, where normally there´s sand there is instead rock, lots of them. when the tide pulls back they sound like a deep fryer. the place was full of very white tourists and a small asian who is looking for where the deep fryer is.

food is cheap. had a seafood platter with pisco cocktail for 15 aud. ended up walking home at 10, lost time sampling cubans (they all tasted like smoke), was surprised by how safe it was. i did carry a switch blade on me (11 aud), but besides the horde of beautiful joggers and dog walkers no one was out. the cars still beeped but i learnt by then that was their way of saying, "hello, i am a machismo minded male showing everyone how heterosexual i am by honking at every vag i pass, good day!"

called mother who told me Manny seemed sad. i´m not those losers who anthropomorphises their pets. i know she doesn´t miss me. i know she only wants to know what happened in the next episode of Battlestar and if Adama and Roslin get it on.

the hot water was hot. for 5 minutes. the internet is fast.